at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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