Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize