i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Randomize
