We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Randomize
