I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Randomize
