I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
