Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
