its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
