Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
My vagina is very pro this idea
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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