all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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