But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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