if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
