I think i sorta joined a cult last night
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Randomize