I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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