making cat noises will not fix the situation.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
