Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
try to milk me bitch
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