dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
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did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
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Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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