ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
