Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
