yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
