Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
