Duck Duck Cougar?
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Randomize