yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I am naked and annoyed.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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