omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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