Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
