I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
23 People Have Step Parents That Are Younger Than Them
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night