i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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