I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize