addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
