Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
