she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
