so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
