I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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