It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
