He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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