Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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