i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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