i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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