I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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