I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize
