Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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