jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize