She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize