did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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