I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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