high people should be assigned attendants
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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