i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
We need to rekindle our bromance
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
