ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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