That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize
