He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
